A Losing Battle Against Yourself

You can take all the medication, recieve all the helpful therapy money can buy but unless you resolve issues within yourself, you will never be whole and never fully recover from depression or psychological distress. You may have been raped for years, verbally abused or beaten or even neglected. No matter what your situation is, who you are, where you are, however much or little access you have to medications and treatments... you won't get anywhere unless you win the battle against yourself. Especially when it comes to child abuse, false principles and insticts are imbedded within our subconscious, they dictate our lives, our emotions, and are most commonly not truly applicable to us as individuals. They are lies, harsh, careless, hurtful lies that can wreck our futures and all chances that we ever had of contentment. And they can kill. Because once these whipsered or bellowed words are drilled and inserted into you, they're there to stay and almost nothing can expell them from our minds and hearts. And you become your own enemy, a foe on a mental-emotional battle field, and it is a fight to the death. It may sound dramatic, but it holds truth. Either the lies you have been told will succeed, corrupting you fully with anger and fear, or the real you, the you that say's you're beautiful, worthy and deserving of affection can overcome it all. To achieve this though, all you have to do is make the decision for yourself to change and reinforce it. That's when the therapy comes in and the medication makes it less stressful on your body but those are aids, not independant miracles. Reinforce your decision with things like coping skills and self-affirmations. Tell yourself the truth, that you're strong and independant and you're not ugly, you're not weak or stupid or unwanted. Combat the clouded mind with reaching out to others, whenever you hear the whispered words of 'no one wants you here,' reach out and be frank, "am I.... getting in your way or anything?" and 99/100 times they'll say no. Because 99/100 times, abusive thoughts are pure and simple lies. (And they're usually rather uninteligent- you're stupid,- really? And what does that word choice and vocab. say about you?) But the worst thing about abuse is that it becomes something habitual. You experience withdrawal without and and that's how self-abuse starts, sprung off of another type of abuse and tenfold as hurtful. You feel uncomfortable when someone's not putting you down, and so you use what you've been told to afflict the pain upon yourself. It's a vicious process, but (even though it sounds generic,) the first step is deciding you're going to think for youself and seek the truth. And again, 99/100 times, people WILL help you. (This has all been from studies combined with self-experience)